The President will pardon on Wednesday Caramel and Popcorn, two turkeys that will likely die anyway within the next year. This isn’t because they are old, but because we humans groom turkeys to be so fat that they die from obesity-related illnesses. Caramel and Popcorn, nearly 40 pounds, are larger than the largest wild turkey, and are two to eight times larger than the average. In sum: according to the White House, twenty-two turkeys have been pardoned and, according to National Journal, they are all dead, with only one surviving to the next Thanksgiving.
@yogi, this inspired one of my captions.