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SmilingSmartBlonde
SmilingSmartBlonde

deleted. It was just a bit too snarky

53underscore3
53underscore3

Six Six Six - the bumbler of the neeece, er, I mean the numbler of the beast, er....

sacredh
sacredh

Biden: I wonder why Mitt couldn't get hold of Christie to talk about the VP slot?

.

Obama: Caller ID.

sacredh
sacredh

Obama: Mitt has narrowed his VP choice down to three people but he can't choose which one.

.

Biden: I hear they have to draw straws and the loser has to accept.

53underscore3
53underscore3

Obama:

No.  They play Russian roulette. 

It's funny though, it's not that they can't decide, it's that every time they hand the next guy the gun, he reloads all the chambers before he holds it to his head.

sacredh
sacredh

I wonder if the talk about Romney announcing his choice for VP before the convention is just blowing smoke or if it's really being considered? The way this tax return stuff is hurting Romney makes me wonder if he thinks he has to do something dramatic to deflect the criticism.

53underscore3
53underscore3

We've been getting a few T-storms out here, but not like what you get.

Today it's about 68 and raining.

sacredh
sacredh

Not much is going Mitt's way right now. I din't give him much of a chance before this tax return issue became so prominent. I think he's sunk.

.

OT, but it looks like we're going to get a hell of a storm here any minute now. It was 98 5 minutes ago and now it's 86. The sky is black and thunder is shaking the house. It's nice living on a hill top, but not when it's like this.

53underscore3
53underscore3

I think he's going to hold off, but that might backfire.

His reasoning might be that the less time his choice is exposed to fire from the Obama camp the better.

I think though that Obama's proxies are diligently researching everyone that might be chosen and already has a plan in place for each.

And as for the 24/7 news cycle, it'll be fresh and tuned to peak right around election week.

sacredh
sacredh

Obama and Biden react to the news that the theme song for the republican coonvention is "Mama, We're All Crazy Now".

peacock2828
peacock2828

Crazy Train? The possibilities are endless.

Sean13
Sean13

You think this is awkward, wait till you see where Clinton let me touch him!!!

sacredh
sacredh

Biden: Are you worried about Romney pulling an October Surprise?

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Obama: No. My sources say Romney won't release it until December.

sacredh
sacredh

Biden: Is it OK if I rub your shoe?

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Obama: Higher.

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Biden: Is it OK if I rub your knee?

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Obama: Higher.

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Biden: Let's get out of here.

53underscore3
53underscore3

[POTUS snarling through fake smile]

Damn your breath stinks!

LK312
LK312

POTUS: Michell said the same thing a few minutes ago when the kiss cam was on.

sacredh
sacredh

Biden: Well, if I didn't have to kiss your @ss everyday just to stay on the ticket....

53underscore3
53underscore3

[Michelle thumps Biden's head]

Joe, keep your hands off my husbands shoes!

carlcid
carlcid

Biden: "Did you hear the ole' tax dodger say that he won't release his tax returns because you'd distort and be dishonest about it?"

Obama: "Really? Did he mention being honest about his tax returns?"

Biden: "No. But I couldn't help cracking up watching Sununu go nuclear. Those guys are losing it!"

jensensah
jensensah

Oh, the good times just keep rolling on, and on and on!!! Obummer.your days are numbered, your time is through, and YOU WILL BE REMEMBERED, AS THE WORST MISTAKE, UNITED STATES, HAS EVER MADE!!! Sad part is, HE WILL BE PROUD OF THAT!!! 

jmac
jmac

An appropriate example of conservative humor.  Missing in Action.  No wonder Bush thought Colbert was a Republican.  

53underscore3
53underscore3

Look this is 1k Words, not Playtime Propaganda.  You have got to work on that humor!

sacredh
sacredh

Biden: Got our October Surprise ready?

.

Obama: I have a video of Mitt having oral sex with frumpy cleaning lady.

.

Biden: OMG!

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Obama: The cleaning lady pops her head in Mitt's office, says "Goodnight Mr. President" and then he orders her into the room. He closes the door, makes her kneel in front of him and then he screams "YOU'RE FIRED! YOU'RE FIRED! YOU'RE FIRED!" for 4 or 5 minutes. She starts to cry, Mitt shivers a couple of times, takes all the money from her purse and then walks out smiling.

.

Biden: JESUS!

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Obama: That's not the best part. After Mitt leaves, the cleaning lady takes off her shaw and wig....it's Donald Trump in drag!!!

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Biden: Let's stick with the tax returns.

La_Randy
La_Randy

Biden: Now Mitt's tax returns are a big phocking deal!

georgiamd
georgiamd

Can you believe it, Barack, we feed them these bogus numbers on the economy and liberals keep swallowing it, hook, line and sinker! Is that a hoot, or what?

jmac
jmac

Biden:  "Did you hear the one about Mitt promising to get the guy who hit us on 9/11 - retroactively?"  

kbanginmotown
kbanginmotown

On his first day in office...(along with everything else)...

MrObvious
MrObvious

Biden

HAHAHA, Did you know that 3x and paulejb called ME stupid?

Ivy_B
Ivy_B

Olivia, thanks for the 1,000 words, but the last three were Obama. Surely there's one worthy pic of Mitt.

forgottenlord
forgottenlord

Actually, there isn't one that hasn't included Obama since May 16th (Boehner).  There's been a lot since.

jmac
jmac

Joe - "Romney walks into a bar with his tax accountant, his BFF NASCAR team owner, and the Burmese designer of his Olympic team's uniforms . . . "

jmac
jmac

An A.S. reader on Romney outsourcing Olympic costumes to Burma:   "Romney was not responsible for this decision!  At the time he was on temporary leave from the Olympics and back in Boston.  I believe he was taking care of some important Bain business."  

53underscore3
53underscore3

Retroactive temporary leave.  Get your facts straight.

Bub...... :)

kbanginmotown
kbanginmotown

"...and the bartender says, 'Who needs a stiff one?'

The 3 guys all look at Romney, then back to the bartender and reply: 

'We're good, thanks.'"