How Newt Gingrich Can Cash in By Cashing Out

A Swampland competition to plot a profitable post-campaign future for the former Speaker.

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Evan Vucci / AP

Republican presidential candidate, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich listens to a question during a news conference Feb. 4, 2012 in Las Vegas.

With Rick Santorum out of the race and Ron Paul running on principle (read: going nowhere), Newt Gingrich is the last man standing in opposition to the presumptive Republican presidential nominee, Mitt Romney. Which means Gingrich faces an important, dare I say a fundamental question. How can he monetize the situation?

As you may have read, Gingrich has money woes. His campaign is $4.5 million in the hole. A campaign check to Utah bounced. Even his former health consultancy has filed for bankruptcy protection.

Fortunately, being a politician these days is as much about lining up a lucrative post-hustings payday as it is about public service. But just because Sarah Palin, Mike Huckabee and Chris Dodd hit it big in their second careers, doesn’t mean Gingrich can navigate his prodigious self into a debt-clearing deal after his costly effort to pummel with grandiose ideas the elite forces that are destroying this great country.

Gingrich, it should be noted, says that he’s in it all the way to Tampa. But even as he declared his fidelity to the campaign Tuesday, it was clear where his mind was, as he “humbly” asked Santorum’s supporters to give him cold, hard cash at Newt.org. That doesn’t seem like much of a plan. Perhaps the best thing Gingrich supporters, or those who want him to leave the race, can do to secure his financial future is come up with bigger ticket ways the former Speaker can cash in by cashing out.

So Swampland invites its readers to enter the “Make Newt Rich Again” competition with suggestions for how Newt can prepare for a post-campaign payday. Drop us a line in the comments. We’re looking for humor here, not rudeness; and Swampland can’t distribute prizes, but perhaps the Romney campaign will.