1,000 Words

What is this a picture of?

Was that funny?

…Look closely, Mr President, and you’ll see the energy collector that we’ll be testing at the next Tea Party. It can power a small city solely on “wingnutium”…

And unlike Sarah Palin’s head, Mr. President, these lights stay on…

President Obama closely inspects the flawless metal at the Toyota plant assembly line.

President Obama regrets taking the purple microdot before speaking to the house leadership.

Obama shares the stage with all the employees added by the clean-energy initiative at the robotically operated Siemens facility……

The RNC darkens Presidents Obama’s image in a new fund raising ad designed to scare the anti-Christer crowd. The theme from The Exorcist plays in the background.

“Nice, but if you guys would repurpose the A, E and F processors to handle more prevalent data formats you could improve throughput by, oh, about 74%.”

haha laughin out loud..

“So, this is the material wingnuts are made from?”

Obama: So let me get this straight. This metal absorbs sunlight, converts it to energy and if a Teabagger comes into contact with it, it acts like a bug zapper?

Obama: Mirror mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all? WHAT? Sarah Palin? Again!

“Oh, so this is what those Stargate guys were talking about.”

P. D. has the Best Caption.

“So it has a red spine and doesn’t want to kill all of humanity? Yeah. Right.”

“In front of a crowd of astonished scientists and reporters, President Obama bent space-time with his mind in an attempt to fix the teleprompter.”

Ah yes, being an expert on anything and everything, Obama declares this new technology to be innovative and inspiring. It reminds him of fairy dust and he envisions a future where just a sprinkle, will turn sane, law abiding Americans into day dreaming liberals. When this happens, he completes his transformation of a proud, industrious America into a whining and begging “nanny state”! Of course, if the technology fails, then blame it on Bush.

Obama. This is incredible. This is made entirely of synthetics, space age metals and chemicals and McDonalds is selling it as FOOD?

For the sci-fi minded Tea Bagger: Agent Obama gets ready to enter the Matrix to combat Neo Conservative, aka the one we call Sarah.

Obama: This is smart metal with molecular memory abilities?

Worker: Yes Mr. President. It’s a product of nanotechnology breakthroughs developed in Mississippi.

Metal: Get your grubby hands off of me you socialist!

Warp Speedy Scotty!

“Cover art for a new Ramsey Lewis retrospective was leaked to the press today . . .”

President Obama inspects the new Toyota VHS tape about to hit the market.

Oh, hi there. Didn’t I see you in Avatar?

Obama: I like this new metal. It looks European.

In Ayn Rand’s utopian “Free Market” world that wingnuts dream about:
.
Obama: Hmm, Is this the famous Rearden metal? Maybe I should nationalize the technology and re-distribute wealth.

Obama inspects a part used in the secret “Obamabots”: liberally programmed robots that will take over the world. Somewhere in Pennsylvania there’s a redoubt occupied by an amateur militia run by some guy named “Rusty.” But they are too late; thousands of Obamabots are descending upon the compound and there are not enough supplies or ammo to defend against the liberal / conservative siege. You can still hear those brave words: “I TOLD you we shoulda stopped at Walmart to pick up more canned food and ammo but NOOOO you wanted to watch the NFL Draft…”

No, actually instead of a Siemens Obamabot plant, this is really a Pfizer plant. They’re just starting to make a new Viagra™ that works for both men and women with no ill side effects …but in addition to improved bedroom performance it also erases all base thoughts / memories of anything “conservative” and replaces them with “liberal” ones. But the pharma mfr. won’t put that on the label.

…of course no physical harm was done after the siege fell. The RW’ers simply became more polite afterwards, began thinking single payer HC is not so bad after all, and started showing any respect and courtesy to the swampwomen.

Jedi Master Obama demonstrates Force Bubble.

I didn’t realize how big the blades on these wind turnbines were! I now know what to do with the Republicans who vote no on energy legislation!

Obama: You’re telling me that the human body contains trace elements of precious metals and chemicals and that by processing just 346 Teabaggers you can produce something useful? Outstanding.

Worker: Yes Mr. President. As an added bonus, we produce several tons of fertilizer. It turns out that they’re full of sh!t too.

“Wait a minute guys — you’ve got to be kidding! You mean I can walk along this thing and get to the Fifth Dimension — and find Dionne Warwick when she was 25???

Hey, hey, HEY!!! (Turning to an aide) Call Michelle and tell her I won’t be home for supper tonight. In fact, tell her I won’t be home for a day or two!”

– A very excited President Obama; he later gives a Congressional Medal of Freedom to Siemens, Inc.

Obama finds himself transported to the twenty third century, where future historians ask him, WTF caused the Tea Party and if he allows then to take over the government, we will be forced back to the dark ages by two thousand twenty five.