Sarah Palin: Author! Author!

“Palin will reflect on the key values—both national and spiritual—that have been such a profound part of her life and which continue to inform her vision of the future.”
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????????????????????????????????

How many of the 2.2 million copies sold are stacked in her basement or being used to level kitchen tables across the nation?
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Inquiring minds want to know…

Ghost Author! Ghost Author!

“The book will include selections from classic and contemporary readings that have inspired her”
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Will “My Pet Goat” be included among them?
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Will she be able to crib the book titles and authors on her hand for the inevitable book tour?

I’ll have my Crayola set at the ready.

Important point – book publishers will pay an “author” $ X in advance and pre-print a set amount of books to be distributed to bookstores and other places who ordered coopies. That doesn’t mean the book will sell well; odds are good that it could be in the discount bin in a couple of weeks. SP won’t care ’cause she’s got her $ and any more from actual sales would be gravy.
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“Nice girl but about as sharp as a sack of wet mice.” –Foghorn Leghorn

Oh good, another book to ignore.

er, copies

With the Foghorn Leghorn reference, I liked “coopies” better.

Anybody here feeling ashamed of themselves yet?
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Nahh… didn’t think so.

Palin will reflect on the key values—both national and spiritual—that have been such a profound part of her life…
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Giving up when the going gets tough, dishonesty, vindictiveness, ignorance, and style over substance?

Excel, ah say, excellent point!!!

“as well as portraits of some of the extraordinary men and women she admires and who embody her love of country, faith, and family.”

Jeff Davis, lynch mobs and Donna Reed. Wow that is a poweful mix of characters.

My favorite part of the press release:

“The book will include selections from classic and contemporary readings that have inspired her, ”

So she’s not even going to ghost write it completely, it’s going to be padded out with work from other authors. Given the passive expanse of her daily news intake (“all of them”) I can only wonder how voracious her literary intake must be. What readings has she found inspirational? The possibilities are endless…

Damn, why didn’t I write a book! Oh, my bad, Sarah didn’t either! Who wrote hers?

If I don’t believe, for example, that JFK wrote his Pulitzer Prize book (Profiles in Courage), nor Why England Slept, all by himself, there is no way I could imagine Palin writing even a passable term paper. Just not possible.

You betcha.

Remember during one interview, asked to name some media publication she read, she was unable to even think of one, even if it were a lie. If she can’t even do that, there might be a problem coming up with “classic and contemporary readings that have inspired her”. Somebody needs to tell her that Fox News doesn’t count.

The woman is an insult to the written word

I can’t tell you how impressed I am.
There are over two million Americans who love Sara Palin AND know how to read!

My own estimate would have bee more like forty or fifty, not over two million!

I bet Tina Fey is thrilled.

It’s not hard to become a best-selling author when you have organizations purchasing thousands of copies of your book which they then give away in order to promote the right-wing agenda. It’s a pretty common practice apparently.

Will Sarah (or her ghostwriter) retell her latest version of the Wild Ride? How much will the story change this time? (and where is Trig’s birth certificate? but I digress)

Oh, Tina’s future is assured.
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And, even though she is a talented script writer in her own right, these jokes will almost write themselves!!
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It’s going to make professional life for her a LOT easier!

I was telling someone the other day how un-impressed I am with Sarah Palin. Not so much in intellect, but as a pol. When she first came out with that snarky RNC speech, I donated 100 bucks to the Obama campaign that night. I felt it was my duty that this lady should not get anywhere close to 1600 Pennsylvania av.

Now everytime she is is on t.v (alot)..i just shrug and move on. She was railing against hollywood starlets (ashley judd, letterman, family guy) and now she is shopping a tv show ito hollywood and raiding the Oscar pre-show free giveaway booths.

She was railing against govt health care but her grandson, Tripp who is less than 1/100th Indian, gets free health care through the Native American health care system.

I know the Dem way out would be to allow her to stay in the public view, but I just want her to go away..just leave,please…

Thanks for pointing this out. It is too often neglected when best seller numbers are trotted out.

If there’s any justice in this world, Palin will quote liberally from Idiocracy:

And there was a time in this country, a long time ago, when reading wasn’t just for fags and neither was writing. People wrote books and movies, movies that had stories so you cared whose ass it was and why it was farting, and I believe that time can come again!

Let America be America again!

Judging from the huge mobs at her book signings, I’d say these numbers are real.

It untitled huh? This sounds like a contest to me.

First possibility:

Sarah Palin: T&A (Thinkin’ and Arguin’)

We’re screwed, then.

We’d better ask an Alaska paper to verify that, right!

Oh heck, just put her on the Home Shopping channels and she’ll do just fine!

Reading, Righting and Rapture:
How I Became President of Alaskastan

Palin’ Around with the Tea Baggers
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Palin’s America in Simple Drawings and Very Small Words.
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How to Headshot a Wolf or Other Mammal Every Time

I can see Washington from my house!

Karen, Miley Cyrus, ol’ Hanna Montana herself, could be President if they lowered the voting age to 8. What’s the point about the “real mobs”?
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Barack Obama is President now in large part because many non-wingnut conservatives stayed home. Why? Because they washed their hands of the fearful choice of putting that wacko near the White House.

Even the Democrat-hating gun nuts I have to work with think she’s a twit. They bought all the negatives said about her… and they hate Obama.

Why don’t we get beyond the camp following just to fill a page… unless you think she has a real chance of being or deciding the next President of the United States… or confine youself to the “entertainment” page.

I Can See Russia From the White House
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It Takes a Village to Raise Five Childs and Use Them for Props at Book Signings and Political Speeches Also
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Okay, I Like Finally Know What the Vice President Doe

An early excerpt has been leaked to the web:

People who know me know that I love America and the vastness of its riches in inspirational historical figures. Since I was a little girl I, I have been INSPIRED by all the amazing and PRINCIPLED people who have lead us on this wonderful journey that I call our national destiny.

People such as George Washington — of course, he’s our nation’s father figure, really — and Thomas Jefferson, who understood that this great nation — blessed with great resources like I know well coming from Alaska — could not become great, really, without PRINCIPLES and standing up for them.

And this is why I chose to talk about these people because the mainstream media won’t tell tell you how these PRINCIPLED founders founded this country in such a wonderful and humbling way for those of us who follow in their footsteps to try to follow.

“I Can See the Outhouse From My House”.
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“The Greening of the Land: Political Fertilizer and Its Uses In the NEW Economy”

Well, she’ll have a ghost writer do the actual writing of the book so it’s reasonable to assume that she’ll be having the ghost writer work with a ghost reader to some up with books that she hasn’t actually read to be inspired by.

Where’s Karen’s book?

She’s probably afraid to mention it… this thread’s been absolutely BRUTAL!!

Karen’s book I’d look forward to. Ditto for Jay (her diverse background) or Amy (divinity recipes?). I’ll even read Michael’s poetry – his own instead of a “my favorite poems” thingy; anyone can do that.

As long as they can deal with the inevitable Swampland “literary reviews” by the inhabitants…

Well, this probably includes sales of books on CD.

@square1: OK, like, that excerpt made my teeth hurt. Moreso, only, because I think it’s a real quote, also.

Nuturing America: Everyone Calls me A Mother

The Real Me: Scratch and Sniff

“It Takes a Village Idiot”

From Nome to NASCAR: I’ve Been Everywhere Where Man

“Making Mooseburgers for Middle Management”

Inspirations: These Are A Few Of My Favorite Thangs

“Advanced Snipe Hunting Techniques”

“Leadership Techniques: How to Out-Smart a Bag of Hammers So You’re Not At the Bottom”

Goldman’s Sack: How To Make Money

You Dodged A Bullet: The 2008 Campaign

“Manipulating the Stock Market: Looting for Fun and Profit”

The Lovely Bone: How McCain Changed My Life

“Shooting Yourself In the Foot: Rahm Emanuel’s Tried and True Management Secrets”

Forrestina Gump

You DO know WE should be ashamed of ourselves, don’t you?

I Quit! My Life So Far

“Selecting a Vice-President: The Importance of a Firm Ass(et)”

Sure. But there’s shame and then there’s SHAME.
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This is a small letter shame. I’ve been prepping walls all day and I need to unwind.

I have read the book and it is next to my elbow to do so again. Don’t talk if you haven’t read it. Buy your own copy like I did; it is a treasure.

http://ikejakson.wordpress.com/2010/01/05/a-bright-star-over-alaska/

“I Quit – And I Promise NEVER to Stop Doing So”

“Knowing When to Withdraw: A Guide to Marriage Relations and Political Campaigning”

This will probably earn us a “sternly-worded letter” from KT and Joe Klein for littering up the Swamp.

Beauty Queens Need Teabagged Too: Politics Unusual

A sternly worded letter is better than a summons anyday.

On Top: My Life With Todd

“Educational Potpourri: Sarah Palin’s Journey Through Academia”

The Chinball Wizard: Getting A Head In Politics

Maybe I’d better stop. The inappropriate comments are starting to surface. I think I’ll pollute another thread.

“Political Victory Doesn’t Always Mean Finishing On Top”

“Three’s a Crowd: Undercover Political Dealmaking”

Sorry, KT. Bad boys, we know. We promise to behave.

Did you notice the person who is saying all of these positive things about the book is writing in the same font? STOP IT SARAH !!!!!!!!!

“You haven’t really done it, until you have done it with an inuit – how to put the bounce back into blubber”

“i call it Up’s Syndrome – how to use adversity to advance your career”

None.

During the presidential campaign, an editor of a liberal woman’s magazine spent a good bit of time with Sarah and wound up writing a glowing article about her. She said that Mrs. Palin is highly intelligent and a woman of high moral character, a person of whom we should all be proud. High praise, indeed, coming from a committed liberal.

The liberal press has spread many toxic lies about Sarah greatly to their eternal shame. And many are the abysmal fools who have fallen for their deception. This in spite of the obvious fact that she is much to be admired above former president Roosevelt who got us into WWII in an effort to become president of the world; she has already demonstrated better administrative skills than the hopelessly incompetent Truman; better than the military bureaucrat Eisenhower; better than the sex addicted playboy Kennedy; better than the bitter, fumbling putz Nixon; better than the slimy con-man Johnson; better than the brain impaired Ford; better than the smiling, unconscious fool Carter; better than the Alzheimer’s impaired Reagan; better than the hopelessly clueless Bush I; better than the sex crazed psychopathic Clinton; better than the lets-pretend conservative, spoiled brat Bush II; and infinitely better than the pseudo American and extremely dangerous pathological narcissist B. Hussein Obama.

As one who has lived under the administrations of all the above thoroughly incompetent presidents, I can say with assurance that Sarah is superior in every way to all of them. None of them were or are as highly intelligent as is she; in fact, they were and are none too bright to a man. None of them were or are as insightful as is she, except, perhaps, for Reagan. None of them were or are as well spoken as is she, not even Obama or Reagan. None of them had or has the sterling moral character that Sarah consistently exhibits.

Even the greatest French wines, Richbourg, for instance, require seasoning to reveal their marvelous innate quality. So is that also true of people. Sarah will get that seasoning in the next few years and will be ready to take on all comers when the time is right to do that for which she has been called of God. And the nattering nabobs of negativism will not be able to stand in her way.

“nattering nabobs of negativism”
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Spiro Agnew lives!

“Sorry, KT. Bad boys, we know. We promise to behave.”

You lie!
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The Teabaggers and Me: Drill Baby, Drill!

“and infinitely better than the pseudo American and extremely dangerous pathological narcissist B. Hussein Obama.”
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Nice touch birther……
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“As one who has lived under the administrations of all the above thoroughly incompetent presidents, I can say with assurance that Sarah is superior in every way to all of them”
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Your delusion is utterly astounding. You base your conclusions upon an article written by the media while discounting her actual performance in her job, not to mention all the things she has said and done. I hope you get your wish and she sacks up and runs in 2012. It’s time for America to choose between sensible leaders and utter morons like Palin that pander to the lowest common denominator.

Hmm. A lot of assertions here, and many of them are… problematic.

For starters: what magazine? Naming it, or better yet, linking to the article, would help.

Then we have your bit about the presidents. Stepping past your conspiracy mongering under FDR, we have your assertion that Sarah Palin is a political Mary Sue: “As one who has lived under the administrations of all the above thoroughly incompetent presidents, I can say with assurance that Sarah is superior in every way to all of them.” First of all, the fact that you were alive under FDR does not in-and-of itself give you better understanding of his administration, unless you were already at the least in your teens-and even then, it gives a slightly picture at best.

Anyway: it would be one thing so say that Sarah Palin is better at skill X than all other presidents. I don’t know what skill X would be, but one can imagine it. But to say that she is better than Johnson at controlling the Congress, than Clinton at making hard but necessary compromises, than Reagan at inspiring the citizenry? That is a tall tale to tell.

And all the evidence you have to work with was a half-term as governor, four months of a campaign, and two dozen or so TV appearances. Evidence which includes such moments of morality as the claim that the turned end-of-life counseling into “death panels” that would kill her baby. Evidence which, for the record, has left 70% of voters, and the majority of her own party, with the view she is unqualified for the Presidency.

Yeah. Long story short: you’re long on hyperbole here, and short on actual evidence.

(And B. Hussein Obama? What is this, 2007?)

Hmmm. The “Farce” is strong with that one, Luke.

Thanks afguy. The farce has decided that this one has to go out for a few hours and pick up paint. My path is clear. Have fun.

…when the time is right to do that for which she has been called of God.
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Called of God??? Didn’t we learn our lesson with the last “self-chosen one” who said that? IIRC, you’ve just resurrected the reason GWB said he needed to be elected. And, by the thinnest of margins, I might add. You don’t think he’s able to get his wishes across to us a little better than THAT?
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If God was making the choices, I have enough faith in his abilities that he wouldn’t need to let her season for a few years – she’s be ready NOW! And, boy, is she NOT READY!
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The partisan basketcase that is our economy and legislative system at the moment should be testimony enough that He’s not guiding what we’re doing to ourselves. The fact that all of this was well underway during the last admin should give you a clue that, if ANYONE is guiding what’s happening, I think you’re looking in the WRONG direction.
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Just entertain the possibility that we are being given enough rope to hang ourselves with our OWN corruption, NOT with His oversight. Maybe, he just wants to see how badly we can shoot ourselves in the foot, with OUR own ideas, before he steps in.
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God ain’t either GOP or Dem – OR Tea Party!!!